The lights are off. It's hard to see.

The lights are off. Someone switched them off a while ago. It's hard to see. But I like it that way. It's like no one can reach me that way. It's like a different world exists. One where I can do all the things I'm usually too scared to do. There are too many things going on for them to keep up with me. Its like I'm just out of reach. I like being out of reach. I can't get hurt that way. Well its harder for the hurt to reach me that way. But it hurts in other ways. I'm not sure which is worse. It's always been like this, some join for a while and it works then it seems they can't keep up. They can't keep my mind engaged. Why is that? What does it take to engage me on another level? Not the mundane everyday one but a world where all the unseen things exist. Like a world where me and you are dreamers and we run through the forest hand in hand without our shoes. I love the feeling of walking barefoot on the hard surface with a few leaves and twigs crunching underneath my feet. It takes me to that place that I struggle to reach in other circumstances. You're calling to me again but I've gone to far along the path for your voice to reach me. Is it that I'm not making enough effort to engage or that the moment has passed? I'm sure we will find out soon one way or another. The truth always wins in the end.