My soul...

My soul is yearning, crying out for something...

That something is me...

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The sound surrounding us

The sound surrounding us is like the thought of drowning which I can only imagine is being trapped in a endless sea of suffering. Like death, that helpful reminder than all could be lost in an instant or being trapped inside my mind like the man on the diving bell and the butterfly only he didn't die and was trapped without being able to talk. The feeling overwhelms but keeps me calm, like that feeling of being under water but knowing you can surface at any moment. My brain is running a million miles an hour and then I close my eyes and it stops, everything slow down and I can see clearly. My mind is empty, like that time you decide to empty your bag out and feel how clean everything has become. Like that weird advert I also remember of the woman putting everything she eats in her handbag rather than in the bin. This emptying is important to make things right again. I've spent many years re-living whats wrong and I can see now, what I could not before or so I think. Its only a ...
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The chaos that surrounds us

There is a knot in the wire. You think that is so easy to undo it but my darling you are wrong. It's not as easy as it used to be. Things are getting harder and harder these days. There are the times when things are falling out of my window and I want to try and stop them but it’s no use. The are always out of reach and falling.  It hurts but its the truth. The truth is banging on the window like a bird who will not stop singing in my ear. My ears are hurting from all of the chaos that surrounds us. It's there and nothing can break it down. My socks are wet again, I always walk in the puddles no matter how many times or whatever I do to try to dodge them, it happens. I'm used to it now. I like being barefoot and walking around like nothing matters. I can feel the mud in between my toes and you are smiling as though somehow this is the funniest thing you have ever seen. The chaos is calling my name again and I'm running down the street and I almost make it out of s...
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No one can hear me

It's like a rollercoaster you can never step foot off. But one that you wouldn't want to anyway. I am leaning in and you are around the back like you always are, why does this feel familiar. I am seeking as always and the dissatisfaction has found me again, I want to hide out again and never come back. I am calling your name and I know this is the real things but find my self wondering or is it wandering? I am always wondering and curious to know if you do too. We are not the ones we were before. We have come back to see if this is what it is all about. You are what I am all about, my fingers type fast and furious and I can't get enough, Its been too long and I don't know where to stop. I never know where to stop. I am longing for you and I cant have you any more. The sand falls between my fingers and beneath my feet and I can reach out and whisper but no one can hear me anymore. 
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