The sound surrounding us

The sound surrounding us is like the thought of drowning which I can only imagine is being trapped in a endless sea of suffering. Like death, that helpful reminder than all could be lost in an instant or being trapped inside my mind like the man on the diving bell and the butterfly only he didn't die and was trapped without being able to talk. The feeling overwhelms but keeps me calm, like that feeling of being under water but knowing you can surface at any moment. My brain is running a million miles an hour and then I close my eyes and it stops, everything slow down and I can see clearly. My mind is empty, like that time you decide to empty your bag out and feel how clean everything has become. Like that weird advert I also remember of the woman putting everything she eats in her handbag rather than in the bin. This emptying is important to make things right again. I've spent many years re-living whats wrong and I can see now, what I could not before or so I think. Its only a matter of perception but its true for me today. I'm sorry it took me so long,  I'll be with you one day without all the frills and fancy clothing. I'll be wearing my odd socks one with a hole in the toe and the other that has seen better days. I like that I'm now able to wear them it used to be different.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Tomorrow is home to me

The sense that something new is emerging comes thick and fast. We are settling in, nesting and getting ready for her to arrive. She is holding my hand in my dreams and I know she is on the way. The right time is always the right time. You never know but yet you do. I can see you from a far and see beyond the words which you speak. I am dreaming often these days. Someone once took my dreams away and replaced them with empty nights filled with nothing other than the feeling of being frozen like stuck in the bottom of the river unable to speak. This is long gone now and I reach for you. My voice is heard and understood in ways beyond everything I imagine. We are holding each other enough to be free and I am always holding your heart in my hands, it's safe with me. Im safe with you. Run in the distance and call my name. I will hear you there always. Tomorrow is home to me. Tomorrow comes again and again.
Read more

We are free

No matter how long it’s been things just carry on without you. Everything looks the same but its the feeling that different. Like it was dream and it was someone else's life, not mine. Now I am back but there is a film covering everything. Maybe it could be a way to protect myself from you, from it all. Or maybe its just different now as, I moved to another place in more ways than one. I know the universe has my back and if I stumble across your path then so be it. I know it is what we always wanted it to be. The ghosts from the past are floating away from us now and we are free.
Read more

They bring me back to you...

It so simple... yet I always forget. It's silly some how that all the things I've built up over the years can disappear in an instant. I'm conscious of my thoughts drifting away from that which is real. Too easily this can happen... The birds... The beautiful birds are singing.  They are calling to me. They bring me back, they bring me back to you and I can't run away any more. I'm sorry I've been running all my life and now my darling I'm back, back in your arms! 
Read more