Call me a professional pretender...

I used to jump from relationship to relationship always changing to suit the needs of the person I was with rather than being myself. I wasn't even sure who I was.  So it for me it fine to just be who they wanted me to be. But I would always get bored and jump ship before I was in too deep. It was so lonely. I also started relationships with anyone who would have me. I was scared to really feel anything so I just pretended, call me a professional pretender if you like. I was so scared to be real that I created all these different versions of myself. But it always left me feeling empty because I couldn't say how I really felt, or do what I really enjoyed. On the surface I looked as though I was happy but deep down I was utterly miserable. Thank fuck I'm not like that any more!

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